Well, Tina Fey and I aren't officially friends, yet, since we've never even met. But this is what I think we'd talk about if we were friends. Cue theme song to buddy comedy.
Tina, POOP. Poop is funny and I know you feel the same way. So I'm about to make poop funnier, with a game in which you come up with movie titles that in some way insinuate the number 2. It's ultimately hilarious and disgusting. My friend brought this game to my attention and my cast (Yeah I'm in a play. Don't act like I didn't tell you.) and I produced some real smelly brain farts. I also can't believe this is the second time I've mentioned poop on this blog. http://tinafeyismyfriend.blogspot.com/2010/06/birds.html And feel free to add to the list, Tina. Otherwise it'll build up inside you and...well you know.
From what I could remember:
There Will Be Blood (my favorite)
Splash
Extract
A River Runs Through It
Deep Impact
The Hurt Locker
Titanic
The Dark Knight
Revenge of The Fallen
8 Crazy Nights
Gone in 60 Seconds
The Last of the Mohicans
Chocolat
Waiting to Exhale
Hope Floats
The Rock
A Hard Day's Night
Almost every Tom Hanks, Tom Cruise, and M. Night Shaymalan movie
Cast Away
Risky Business
Lady in the Water
The Green Mile
That Thing You Do
The Terminal
Catch Me If You Can
Mission Impossible
The Happening
Unbreakable
The Village
Joe vs. The Volcan
Sleepless in Seattle
Knight and Day
Tina, (catching my breath) oh my gosh, oh my gosh Tina, I got out as quick as I could. I think I outran it, I think I outran my guilty conscience. Why do I feel guilty? Because I'm having a donation dilemma: being asked to donate when you're purchasing something at the register. Tina, if I had a quarter every time I've been asked to donate to charities while checking out at the register, I would've withheld a good amount of money from the less fortunate. Don't get me wrong T, I am a sucker for donating. I literally just donated to Stand Up 2 Cancer (www.standup2cancer.org) before posting this. I donate all the time, and I'm an actor, which means I barely have enough money as it is. I always remind myself of that Bible story, where the beggar donated his only gold coin instead of keeping it for himself. (I think that's the story. Where's Veggie Tales when you need it?) I just feel weird donating when the person at the cash register asks you for money, especially since you're buying food, something expensive, or anything at all because you actually have money. It always catches me off guard when they ask, and then I end up feeling guilty and obligated to donate. Sometimes I have to say no, otherwise I'll soon be the one needing the money. If I don't give something, I'm a jerk. If I do give something, then it becomes how much do I donate. Because if I only give a $1, I still feel like a jerk because I'm clearly purchasing something that cost more than a $1. This is what celebrities must feel like when they pass a homeless person as the paparazzi's following them. I want to donate out of the kindness of my heart and not the judging eyes of the sales associate or the people in line. I, of course, assume they're judging me because I'm human...and an actor. I'm pretty, right Tina?
